This Just Might be the Weirdest Blog Post You Ever Read.

This weekend I had the opportunity to watch my nieces cat give birth to her kittens. It was an interesting occurrence that caused me to enter into a deep thought for the past couple of days. But I should probably warn you now. If you are not comfortable talking about natural events in any form, stop reading now, as this blog post will probably make you uncomfortable.

Most of my thoughts centered around different species and the different male/female roles. In most species, I think we can all agree that the male is more dominate. At this point I have to say, that after thinking about these roles, and the dominate gender, I am glad that I am a human female.

Take this cat for instance. After the birth of each kitten, the mother cat has to clean the kitten (of course) and she eats everything. By everything, I mean the placenta, the sac encasing the kitten, everything. That's great Mamma kitty, but I'm all for the placenta going to make shampoo and conditioner to moisturize and nourish the hair of others. Naturally there is a reason for the cat eating it. Not only to clean up the mess, but the placenta helps her milk be more nourishing for her newborns. (How weird would it be to walk down the street, or rather, in your backyard, and see a cat placenta just laying there. I don't know about you but I would probably pick it up and examine it and try to figure out what it is. And then probably end up with some weird disease, or something like that. Maybe people like me are another reason they eat the placenta).

Cats also have another natural instinct. After the kitten is born, they can sense that something is wrong with the kitten and they will desert it. They don't fight for the kittens life like we humans would do. My human brain says "Save My Baby!" But not a cat. Some one else can save it if they want to. But the cat has other things to do. (I believe a lot of animals are like this. And by "this" I mean like the cat).

One last thing about the cat. Male cats have burrs on their penis that cause females all sorts of pain. So the next time you hear a yowling cat, you know why. And for heavens sake, feel for the poor woman!

Next animal- The elephant. Elephants are pregnant for 2 years. Can you say SUCK! Also, elephants hang out in packs. Not like that one Disney cartoon, where there is the daddy elephant and a bunch of ladies, and baby Goliath. Instead they hang out in groups of males and groups of females. They only mix and mingle during mating season. This could be just me, but I would go nuts hanging out with a herd of females all the flippin' time.

Now it's time for the dragonfly and damselfly. The said male flies dig into the female's head and clasp it with his genitalia. And the genitalia will only fit into the head of the female of the same species. So you can't form something like a liger here. (And yes, it does cause the female much pain). Most species, after flying around like this for about 15 minutes, the female ditches the male and goes to lay the eggs in the various locations that that species lays eggs. (Meaning in the water, in the mud, on a plant, etc). But sometimes the male is needed to help lay the eggs so they fly around like that for a bit longer.

Ever wonder about jellyfish? Those creatures that have no brain, blood, muscle, etc. It depends on the species of jellyfish, but most of them do it quite simply. The male spits the sperm into the females mouth. She spits it out and the little jellyfish are free floaters until they attach to something hard and then they form into a polyp. Over a span of years they develop into what we picture as jellyfish.

Male elephant walruses are the ultimate douche bags. You may think it's cool if a man fights for you. But do you think it's cool when he is fighting for hundreds of other ladies? Ok, not hundreds. But a lot of other girls. Maybe if he is defending their dignity right? Not this guy, he's only fighting because it's his job to lay all the ladies. And nobody else gets them. Polygamy just doesn't suit my way of thinking. But we are all entitled to our own opinions.

It's no wonder humans and dolphins are the only ones that have sex for fun. I realize this is probably the weirdest post you've ever read, but it's all natural. So open your mind and realize that while your life might suck, there is another female out there that is having a tougher time than you. And if you are male, don't be a cat, jellyfish, elephant walrus, or any other male. Or ladies will have a good reason to hate you. Over and out.